Random Thoughts and Stories from the River
“Back to the river whenst I came
It’s like nothing has changed
but this water is new
but still brown and opaque
still holding new life
new hope around every bend.
This river is indifferent to me
it cares not what I do
or where I stop to sleep for the night
this river keeps churning
and will keep moving land
long after we are here”
I took a break and leaned back onto the blue tarp right behind my rowing insert. My butt rests on the seat while my back arches over the solitary pole spanning the canoe that keeps it together. I close my eyes and I drift off to sleep while floating on the still water. When away from shore the river makes no noise and I remember waking up and forgetting that I was on the water because it was so calm and quiet.
While sleeping in my hammock last night I couldn’t shake the feeling that I was floating down the river. Falling asleep to the sounds of the water running over fallen logs near the shoreline where I strung my hammock between two Oak trees. I couldn’t get comfortable and would dream that I was going down river. I would wake up and it would take a few moments to remind myself that I wasn’t floating down the river but in fact roped to trees.
My tent is full of hair and sand and blood smears from dismembered mosquitoes.
My favorite thing about rowing is slicing the water when I drop my blade in at the catch on a smooth as glass stretch of water. My favorite sound is the perfectly, evenly timed thunk of the oar at the release when I turn the oar to feather. As trying and mostly painful as the trip is, give me a smooth piece of water where I can slice my oar in and I’ll crank.
I feel like I live between realities and times. The ones I create in my head that I want to live in, the ones I read about and get sucked into, and the one that I’m actually living. And it doesn’t mean I don’t live my life, it’s just sometimes I want more. Sometimes I can’t get enough. Sometimes I want out of my skin.
You know you’re hiker trash or in this case a river rat when you walk into a mall looking for a Dairy Queen with dead mosquito remains and blood smear still on your leg.
